How School Leaders Can Learn to 'Disagree Better'

学校领导如何学会“更好地表达不同意见”

Leading schools through a politically tense era means principals, superintendents, and teachers must learn how to de-polarize conflicts. These could range from divisions among students and parents about the upcoming presidential election to local debates around cellphone restrictions, book bans, or gender-neutral bathrooms.

带领学校度过一个政治紧张的时代意味着校长、督学和教师必须学会如何消除冲突。这些问题可能包括学生和家长对即将到来的总统选举的分歧，以及围绕手机限制、图书禁令或中立浴室的当地辩论。

Schools have always been affected during periods of polarizing conflicts, but due in part to social media, the pitch and intensity of these conflicts may seem larger these days. It’s also unlikely for these polarizing disagreements to disappear any time soon.

在两极分化的冲突时期，学校总是受到影响，但部分由于社交媒体，这些冲突的激烈程度和广度如今看起来更大。这些两极分化的分歧也不太可能很快消失。

“Disagreement is normal,” said Katy Anthes, a former education commissioner in Colorado who is now the director of the FORWARD Initiative at the Public Education and Business Coalition, a Denver-based teacher training and advocacy organization, during a recent virtual discussion hosted by Education Week.

在最近由《教育周刊》主办的一场虚拟讨论中，科罗拉多州前教育专员凯蒂·安特斯说:“有分歧是正常的。”她现在是公共教育和商业联盟的负责人，该联盟是一家总部位于丹佛的教师培训和倡导组织。

Anthes, who trains school leaders to navigate and resolve conflicts, said leaders should strive to keep disagreements “productive,” instead of letting them slide into a “destructive” space. Destructive conflict occurs when those arguing believe that their opinion is better than their opponent’s beliefs.

安瑟斯培训学校领导如何处理和解决冲突，他说，领导应该努力让分歧“富有成效”，而不是让它们滑入“破坏性”的空间。当争论者认为他们的观点比对手的观点更好时，就会发生破坏性的冲突。

To stay in the space of productive disagreement, Andrea Kane, a former superintendent from Maryland, suggested during the panel that it’s important to “humanize” the other person.

为了保持富有成效的分歧，来自马里兰州的前校长安德里亚·凯恩在小组讨论中建议，“人性化”对他人很重要。

“It helps to see this individual as a grandparent. … Listen to them with that lens and accord them the respect,” said Kane, a professor of practice at the University of Pennsylvania’s Graduate School of Education.

宾夕法尼亚大学教育研究生院实践教授凯恩说：“将这个人视为祖父母会有所帮助……用这种眼光倾听他们的声音，并给予他们尊重。”

School leaders avoid conflict because they aren’t trained to deal with it, said Eli Gottlieb, a cultural psychologist who frequently advises educational leaders, among others, on leadership and strategy.

文化心理学家伊莱·戈特利布表示，学校领导避免冲突是因为他们没有接受过处理冲突的培训，他经常为教育领导者等提供领导力和战略方面的建议。

The third panelist in the discussion, Gottlieb said leaders may be afraid to disagree with parents, or have a difficult conversation with school board members, but they can seek training on how to disagree better.

讨论中的第三位小组成员戈特利布说，学校领导害怕与家长意见相左，或者很难与董事会成员进行对话，但他们可以寻求如何更好地表达不同意见的培训。

“This can help them to create a safer environment for their teachers to disagree with them,” Gottlieb said.

戈特利布说，“这可以帮助他们为老师创造一个更为安全的环境，不同意他们的观点。”

School leaders can set ground rules for discussions with people who disagree

学校领导可以为与持不同意见的人讨论制定一些基本规则

A critical strategy to have productive disagreements, the three experts said, is to set some ground rules for the discussion with an opponent.

三位专家表示，产生富有成效的分歧的一个关键策略是为与对手的讨论制定一些基本规则。

In heated debates with school boards, parents, and educators, Anthes said the best strategy, sometimes, is to acknowledge how angry or upset both parties are.

在与学校董事会、家长和教育工作者的激烈辩论中，安瑟斯说，有时最好的策略是承认双方有多愤怒或不安。

“I would ask to set up another time to talk when we were calmer and ready to listen to each other,” she said of these conversations during the pandemic. “I would also set ground rules for the follow-up discussion.”

在谈到大流行期间的这些谈话时，她说：“我会要求安排另一个谈话时间，等我们更平静、准备好倾听对方的时候再谈。”“我也会为后续讨论制定基本规则。”

Setting these ground rules, or norms, for discussion, Kane said, can make opponents more empathetic toward each other even as they argue. Going into a discussion with an “inquiry mindset” means a leader doesn’t go in assuming the other person is there only to argue.

凯恩说，为讨论制定这些基本规则或规范，可以使对手在争论时更加同情对方。带着“探究心态”进行讨论意味着领导者不会假设对方只是来争论的。

“We should assume positive intention,” she said. “You’ve also got to know what triggers you.”

“我们应该假设积极的意图，”她说。“你还必须知道是什么触发了你。”

Focus on a common starting point

聚焦共同起点

Getting some clarity on shared values, even when opponents might beon the opposite sides of an argument, may keep the conversation civil, Gottlieb said.

戈特利布说，对共同的价值观有一些明确的认识，即使对手可能是争论的对立面，也可能使谈话保持文明。

“There are people who are making a living out of making us feel we are divided. It’s fanned by social media. We shouldn’t overestimate polarization,” Gottlieb said.

戈特利布说：“有些人靠让我们感到分裂为生。这是社交媒体煽动的。我们不应该高估两极分化。”

In education, he added, one of the key strategies is to find the value system the arguments are based on. For instance, the conflict could be about religion or gender, but the core value, on both sides, could be about a student’s well-being.

他补充说，在教育领域，关键策略之一是找到论点所基于的价值体系。例如，冲突可能是关于宗教或性别，但双方的核心价值可能是关于学生的福祉。

“We have to find out what the common concerns are,” he said.

“我们必须找出共同关心的问题是什么，”他说。

This also extends to certain phrases like social-emotional learning or equity, which may mean different things to different people, Kane said.

凯恩说，这也延伸到某些短语，如社会情感学习或公平，这对不同的人可能意味着不同的事情。

“We need to have everyone articulate it [before a discussion] and fill in the [gaps],” she said. “Even if we don’t agree, we have a common ground, for the moment, for what we’re talking about.”

“我们需要让每个人[在讨论之前]阐明这一点并填补[空白]，”她说。“即使我们不同意，但目前我们在谈论的事情上有共同点。”